🌸 Expectations vs Experimentation

🌸 When I anticipate an outcome, when I want something to turn out a certain way, I’m really telling myself, “I won’t be okay if this doesn’t go the way I need it to.” I can feel myself shrink, pull away, brace for impact. My shoulders get tight, my jaw tenses, my brow furrows. I want to splat my fears and anxiety onto others, even though it just makes the feeling worse.

🌸 I’m surrounded by a lot of uncertainty right now. I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I’m trusting that I’ll be able to find my ground no matter the outcome, and at the same time I’m aware of the discomfort I feel in not knowing. Taking life one day at a time takes work. It’s okay to be tired. It’s okay to need a break. No one said we need to be relentlessly optimistic. In fact, it’s sort of a radical act to invite the whole gamut of feelings, isn’t it?

🌸 How can I bring an experimenter’s curiosity to my present mood? An experiment doesn’t last forever - it’s a timed event that has a beginning, middle, and an end. And then I get to reassess, based on my experience of the experiment.

🌸 Just for today - or ten seconds - I’m going to try an experiment: I’m going to sit in my couch, pinned down by a kitty cat in my lap, and NOT PLAN ANYTHING. (I know - it sounds terrifying to me, too!). No expectations. Just curiosity. And after ten seconds, I’m going to see how I feel. Do I want to try another ten seconds? What does my body want to do right now? What happens if I listen?

🌸 What’s your ten-second experiment today?

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